Let’s get real about the holidays

Disclaimer: I do not have any affiliation with the apps I mention. I'm just a huge fan.

It’s that time of year. Time for the annual argument about when the appropriate time is to put up the holiday decorations, to worry about who is hosting what, and buying the best gifts for the people we love in our lives. For so many of us, all of this equals stress, overwhelm, and can even mean depression. How do we change some of the patterns of years past and enjoy the season?

So many times I’ve heard people spout platitudes about the reason for the season, but I have never heard any practical advice about how to get it all done and still observe the things that you hold dear about this time of year.

How do we change some of the patterns of years past and enjoy the season?

BTW: I am purposefully being ambiguous about the holidays I’m talking about. Holidays, no matter which you observe, can conjure up a cauldron of emotions. Let’s follow a new recipe.

• List it

• Schedule it

• Delegate it

• Enjoy it

Now let’s break it down.

1. List it

There are so many things to get done. When we let all of these things swirl around in our heads, it can get overwhelming. Write it out on a sheet of paper, or use an app. I use Google Tasks, Trello, and Google Keep. They are all a little different in the way they work, and I use each for different things in my life. For the holidays I love Trello. I am in charge of the family grab bags for both sides of the family. This platform allows me to keep track of the previous years, and gives me the ability to see what I bought. From there, I can make a list of who to buy for, and ideas of what to buy for them. I can keep track of what has been received or bought, wrapped and delivered.

What other things do you have swirling in your head, eating up your bandwidth? Get them out of your head and listed somewhere, so that you can put it all into perspective.

2. Schedule it

Once you know what you need to do, you have to divide it into hunks, chunks, and bites. Make it make sense. You can spend an hour one day driving around getting restaurant and spa gift certificates. What stores do you shop at? Have you thought of ordering ahead and doing curbside pickup. It’s great! It saves so much time, and it keeps you from buying things you don’t need. We have a couple gift shops I like to go to around the holidays. Schedule a day to do things like that.

Do you host a holiday get together? What can you do ahead of time? Do you have family members to share in the cooking responsibilities? Decide on those things early. Get it out of your head. Make a list, and figure out the timing ahead of time. Not sure about how to do that? Ask the experts. Here’s an article that gives timing tips for Thanksgiving (Insider.com).

We are a family that celebrates Christmas. We put our tree and decorations up during the first week in November, and we get badgered about it every year. The bottom line is that I love my tree. As the days get shorter and colder, it imparts a warm coziness. My tree is a memory keeper. We have all of the ornaments my children have made in school, things we’ve inherited from our parents, and all of the ornaments we have bought on our trips and family reunions. I like to enjoy it as long as possible, so I put it up early. It helps to have that part done.

How can you get creative about scheduling the things that need to get done? Are you going to be heading out to an area near one of your favorite restaurants? Can you turn prebaking into a fun activity with your friends and family?

3. Delegate it

As I mentioned above, do you do all of the cooking? Can you delegate some of that work? Many times, people will be excited to share something that they made. You can ask half of the guests to bring an appetizer and half to bring a dessert. If you really want to simplify things, you can cater. You would be surprised at how many people are doing this. Do whatever is going to allow you the space to enjoy the holidays.

How about shopping for gift giving holidays? If you know what you need to buy, divide and conquer it. Then you can wrap away over some hot chocolate, or a bottle of wine.

Do whatever is going to allow you the space to enjoy the holidays.

Cleaning? Maybe it’s time to teach the kids how to dust. If it’s not perfect, oh well. If you invite friends and family to your home, and you feel like they’re going to judge you, what is the lesson there? I do like to keep a clean house, but we live a busy life, and we do not have a cleaning person. We do the best we can, and everyone in the house helps.

How else can you delegate? Who will help you? Who would love to be included? Who should be helping you?

4. Enjoy it

Once you get to the point where you have everything scheduled and delegated, you can better enjoy your time. Does this take all of the stress out of the holidays? That would be magical, but not very realistic. This gives you the space, and some strategies to allow for more of that. Try one suggestion this year. Another thing to consider. Maybe you or someone you know doesn’t have friends or family to celebrate with. Reach out. Connection is so important, and they may become a part of your family before you know it, or you may become part of someone else’s.

I tried to give you some helpful strategies, but I know that’s not all of them. I would love to hear what you do to make the season less stressful and more magical. Please leave a comment.

Love and Light,

Maria